Are You Making Weight Loss Harder Than It Needs To Be?

Have you ever looked at something you know you need to do and thought:

Nope. Not today. That is way too much.

That was me with my seven-year-old’s bedroom.

I have talked about this room before. I’ve tried tackling one section at a time. I’ve cleaned out little areas. I’ve made some progress.

And then I’d walk back in and somehow it still felt like there was stuff everywhere.

Her dresser had become the landing spot for anything and everything.

Toys didn’t really have a home.

Random things were in random places.

And more than once, I walked into the room, looked around…and shut the door.

If I couldn’t deal with all of it right then, I didn’t really want to deal with any of it.

Sound familiar?

Because I think we do the exact same thing with weight loss.

Sometimes the Project in Your Head Is Bigger Than the Actual Project

This week I happened to have a day without clients and about three free hours.

So I decided:

Today, I’m going for it.

I pulled everything out.

The toy box.

The random containers.

The hidden corners.

All of it.

Then I started separating things into categories that actually made sense for my daughter.

Doll toys here.

Dress-up things there.

Stitch toys—of which she apparently owns approximately 400—in another place. 😂

Things to throw away.

Things that needed a new home.

And then I completely cleared off her dresser.

When I was finished, I think I put about ten things back on top.

And three hours later, I stood in her room thinking:

Oh my gosh. This feels SO good.

Was I tired?

Absolutely.

Did I get to the closet?

Nope. We are not pretending this became some Pinterest-perfect bedroom where the hangers match and everything is color coded.

That is not happening in this house. 😂

But here’s what surprised me:

I had built this project up in my head as though it was going to take three business days, a dumpster, and possibly professional intervention.

Instead?

It took about three hours.

And it made me wonder:

How often are we not avoiding the actual work—we’re avoiding the version of the work our brain has created?

That happens all the time with health and weight loss.

You think:

I need to lose 30 pounds.

I need to completely change the way I eat.

I need to get back in shape.

I need to start meal prepping.

I need to start exercising regularly again.

And suddenly your brain has turned “I’d like to take better care of myself” into a complete life renovation.

No wonder you don’t want to start.

Sometimes the problem isn’t that you’re lazy or unmotivated.

The project just feels enormous.

Maybe you don’t need to overhaul everything you eat.

Maybe you need five dinners your family will actually eat.

Maybe you don’t need a brand-new exercise plan.

Maybe you need two 30-minute workouts on your calendar this week.

Maybe you don’t need to reorganize your entire kitchen.

Maybe one shelf needs to work better.

Sometimes we’re staring at the whole messy bedroom instead of asking:

What actually needs to happen here?

Then My Daughter Did Something I Wasn’t Expecting

Cleaning the room taught me one lesson.

But what happened afterward taught me an even bigger one.

I picked my daughter up from the bus and showed her the room.

I showed her where everything went.

This is where your dolls go.

This is where your dress-up things go.

Here is your dresser—which apparently was hiding underneath all that stuff. 😂

She was excited.

And then she started playing in her room.

That might not sound like a big deal.

But this child usually does not choose to hang out in her bedroom.

We’ll tell her to go play in her room, and she’d much rather be just about anywhere else.

But suddenly?

She wanted to be in there.

And then that night she told me she wanted to try sleeping in her own room.

Y’all.

That was HUGE.

This child has slept in our bed every night.

We have tried encouragement.

Rewards.

There have definitely been bribes involved.

I’m not above it. 😂

Nothing convinced her.

And then all I did was clean and organize her room.

Suddenly, she wanted to be there.

She didn’t magically develop more discipline.

She didn’t attend a seven-year-old personal development seminar and decide it was time to become an independent sleeper.

Her environment changed.

The room felt calmer.

It was easier to use.

There was space.

Things had a place.

And her behavior changed.

That got me thinking about something we often miss when we’re trying to lose weight.

What If You Don’t Need More Motivation?

When a healthy habit isn’t happening, what do we usually ask?

How do I make myself do this?

How do I become more disciplined?

How do I get motivated?

How do I force myself to exercise?

How do I make myself meal prep?

But what if the better question is:

How can I make the behavior I want easier to do?

Because sometimes you don’t need more discipline.

You need less friction.

There is a big difference.

You can still have to put in effort.

You still have to make choices.

You still have to show up.

But there are a lot of ways we accidentally make those choices harder than they need to be.

Meal Planning Is a Perfect Example

I am never going to pretend meal planning is my favorite hobby.

Nobody is going to ask me what I like doing in my spare time and hear:

“Oh, I just love sitting down and planning seven dinners.”

No. 😂

But I do know something about myself:

When I have some kind of dinner plan, my week is much easier.

Because without one, 5:30 PM rolls around.

You’ve worked all day.

Someone has practice soon.

You’re tired.

You’re hungry.

The kids want to know what’s for dinner.

And now your brain has to solve an entire problem:

What should we make?

Do we have the ingredients?

Is the meat frozen?

How long is this going to take?

Will everyone eat it?

Do I need to run to the store?

And eventually your brain says:

Forget it. Let’s pick something up.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with eating out.

But if you keep saying you want to cook at home more often and this exact scenario keeps repeating itself, maybe you don’t have a willpower problem.

Maybe you have a system problem.

What if Monday is tacos?

Tuesday is chicken and rice.

Wednesday is breakfast for dinner.

Nothing revolutionary.

But when 5:30 comes, your brain no longer has to make the decision under pressure.

You already made it.

You just pull the food out and make dinner.

That’s what organizing my daughter’s room did.

Before, everything was everywhere.

There was no obvious place for anything.

Now things have a home.

And when something has a home, putting it there becomes easier.

Do Your Healthy Habits Have Somewhere to Live?

Think about exercise.

Maybe you say:

“I want to strength train more.”

Great.

When?

If your answer is:

Whenever I have time…

that is basically the exercise version of throwing everything into the middle of the bedroom floor.

It doesn’t have a place.

Every day, you have to make the decision again:

Should I work out today?

When could I fit it in?

What workout should I do?

Do I have time?

But if Tuesday and Thursday at 9:00 are your strength-training times?

Now the habit has a home.

You still have to show up.

Unfortunately, organization doesn’t magically lift the weights for you. 😂

But you’ve removed a decision.

The same thing can happen with walking.

Maybe your walking shoes are somewhere easy to grab and you decide that after dinner is when you take a ten-minute walk.

Maybe you want more protein.

Could you keep two or three easy protein foods in your house all the time so you don’t have to invent something when you’re already starving?

Maybe evenings are where you struggle.

Could you decide ahead of time what a normal evening snack might look like if you’re genuinely hungry?

You aren’t removing all effort.

You’re removing unnecessary friction.

Your Brain Already Has Enough Decisions to Make

Maybe you’re thinking:

Michelle, I am not an organized person.

That’s okay.

I’m not telling you to color code your refrigerator.

I’m not telling you to buy 42 clear containers.

Although after seeing what a few containers did for my daughter’s room, I understand the appeal a little more. 😂

This isn’t about becoming an organization expert.

It’s about recognizing that your brain already has enough decisions to make.

And sometimes making one decision ahead of time makes the healthy choice so much easier later.

My daughter walked into a room where things finally made sense.

Maybe some of your healthy habits need the same thing.

A little less chaos around them.

Small Steps Still Count

I also want to make something clear.

I still believe in doing things one section at a time.

There are seasons when one drawer is what you have.

One meal.

One ten-minute walk.

One workout.

That counts.

You do not have to wait until life hands you three uninterrupted hours before you can make progress.

But sometimes you do get a window.

Sometimes you have the time or energy to do a little more setup.

And spending some time upfront can make everyday maintenance much easier afterward.

It took me three hours to reset my daughter’s room.

But now putting things away should hopefully take a few minutes.

That’s the payoff.

Maybe spending 20 minutes coming up with ten dinners saves you hours of decision-making over the next few weeks.

One of the most helpful things I’ve done in the past is come up with around 30 meals my family likes, place them on a calendar, and repeat them month after month.

You don’t even need 30.

Start with ten.

Maybe ten minutes putting your workouts on your calendar means you no longer wake up every morning wondering whether you’re exercising that day.

Maybe buying a few easy lunch options keeps you from getting to 3:00 PM and realizing all you’ve had is coffee.

Sometimes a little work upfront makes the behavior easier again and again.

Maybe the Plan Is Harder Than It Needs to Be

So many women have spent years telling themselves:

I just need more discipline.

I need more willpower.

I just need to follow the plan.

But what if the plan itself is harder than it needs to be?

What if your environment is working against you?

What if you’re requiring yourself to make too many decisions?

What if the healthy behavior doesn’t actually have anywhere to live in your day?

That doesn’t mean you can organize your way out of every struggle.

There will still be hard days.

Workouts will get missed.

Dinner plans will change.

Schedules will go completely off the rails.

I even showed up at the gym recently in flip-flops because I forgot my tennis shoes.

So instead of working out, I mostly hung out and cheered everybody else on.

Some days you forget the shoes. 😂

That’s real life.

But we don’t need to make the normal days harder too.

Stop Asking, “How Do I Make Myself Do This?”

Here’s what I want you to try this week.

Choose one healthy behavior you keep struggling to do consistently.

Just one.

Then instead of asking:

How do I make myself do this?

ask:

What could I do once that would make this easier the next time?

Maybe you write down five dinner ideas.

Maybe you put your gym clothes out the night before.

Maybe you buy a couple of easy lunches.

Maybe you put your workouts on your calendar.

Maybe you prep your water bottle.

Whatever it is, look for the friction.

Where are you making the behavior harder than it needs to be?

And is there one piece of that friction you could remove?

Because maybe you don’t need more motivation.

Maybe you don’t need more discipline.

And maybe you definitely don’t need another strict weight-loss plan.

Maybe you just need to stop making the thing you want to do so hard to begin with.

This week, instead of asking:

What else do I need to add?

Try asking:

What could I make easier?

Start there.